Ten Things All Novices Should Know Before Competing

Last year was my first year of real-live actual competition, and despite the fact that I thought I learned all there was about speech and debate, I learned quite a few things. So, my dear novices, here are ten things you really ought to know before competing.

10. It's Hard To Pay Attention to Timers in TP Rounds

The squiggles means the timer is waving
their hands around, for the record.

Maybe it's because I have my own timer to time myself with, maybe because I'm too busy bumbling through evidence and trying to read my handwriting, or maybe it's because I'm too short to see over the podium. Whatever it may be, I have a very hard time paying attention to timers, even though I was a timer and I understand all the hard work that goes into actually paying attention to the time piece. Hopefully you'll be better at that than me.

9. It Is Surprisingly Easy to Go Into Rounds Wearing Slippers

Sometimes you have awesome friends who tell you to go change your shoes. Other times you go into a round and halfway through you realize that you forgot to put on your heels or ballet flats or whatever. Still other times you don't realize until you get your ballots at the end of the tournament. When I did juniors I had a judge who was wearing fluffy rainbow slippers. I wish I had some of those. I suggest you just get slippers that look like flats so the judges won't notice.

8. It's Possible to Get Eighth Place Ballots

Despite the fact that the lowest rank on the ballot is 'fifth and below', some judges are kind enough to void that and write what they actually ranked you, thus dispelling all hopes that that may have been an actual fifth. I hope that you will never get a judge who does this.

7. You Don't Need to Start Every Speech With "then Let's Begin"

No one likes it. The judges don't, the timers don't, you don't. You will never get on a ballot, 'you should've started your speech by saying "then let's begin.' It's not important and everyone does it. Be a rebel. Don't do it. I know it feels wrong not to, but the judges know that you're going to begin when you ask them if they are ready. They're not expecting you to stand there and say nothing. You will not go to the debate dungeon. You will not get bumped from first to eighth.

6. Don't Wait Until the Day Before the Tournament to Write Your Speech

I think that's pretty self-explanatory. If you write your speech the day before the tournament, 5th and belows will ensue and you could end up in the debate dungeon. You don't want to know what the debate dungeon is.

5. Don't slap people in the face with their own name tags

This doesn't have anything to do with actual competition and is more optional. There aren't any severe consequences. What I really mean is don't slap *me* in the face with my own name tag.

4. Judges Aren't Evil. Or Crazy. Or Robots Set Out to Crush Your Soul

Read the cups.

It's very easy to assume this when you see your ballots for the first time. However I assure you that this is not the case (usually). It's true, some judges make ridiculous remarks. Like one time, a judge told me to control my hair. In that round, my hair had been straightened and put into a side pony-tail. But she gave me first. So I have some conflicted feelings for that judge. You may hear people say that judges are crazy, but those people are wrong. (Unless they actually ARE crazy. But that probably won't happen.) They do their best to offer constructive criticism, and sometimes they come off mean because written words don't properly communicate feelings. And all you judges out there: put smiley faces on ballots. That helps.

3. Ballot Parties Have Almost Nothing to Do With Ballots

Sure, for the first half hour or so, people talk about their ballots and how great judges are, but the rest is just randomness. Discussing tournament horror stories (like how you wore slippers into an impromptu round), complaining about lazy timers, talking about the great impromptu examples Mrs Martin came up with. They're one of my favourite parts of a tournament.

2. You Don't Need to be Afraid of Really Good Debaters/Speechers

That's Chandler Lasch. She's awesome. ;)

Most of them are really nice! It sometimes feels like you're inferior when you walk up to a person who won five speech events and TP, but I assure you they do not feel the same way. They are normal people just like you, even if they have more trophies than some people.

1. Your Ranking Does Not Define You (Unless You Let It)

When you get nothing but Fifth and belows on your ballots, and 15's in speaks, it's easy to believe that that is what defines your skills as a speaker. But it doesn't, not unless you allow it too. After NITOC, I looked at my ballots and got really down on myself. I started to believe that I wasn't good at speech and debate and that I should just give up. It was hard, it really was, even though my speech was about failure. Don't let subjective placings define you. Always remember...

You see what we have learned applies to the round today, and now that our post is done, vote affirmative.